You know, I'm the mother of three children. I've given birth three times, and had two very early miscarriages. I can hardly believe it. Three children.
I love reading about Pregnancy and Birth. Babies and Breastfeeding. Sometimes I hate it too. I have so many emotions wrapped up in how we get treated while being birth and while giving birth. The pain, the ecstasy. The fine line between life and death. As we birth our children, we are birthed as mothers. And in the processes, our hearts tear apart, to bleed periodically for the next 18, 21, 30, 45 years. Forever, really, I think.
This is my page on pregnancy and birth madness. I trust birth. Strangely, frighteningly, I believe in it. I fear it too. Love it, loathe it.
These are my stories. Special and unique. Wonderful. Yet, these are only words, and can never begin to express my truth.
My first daughter was born in a hospital when I was 17. It was a pretty good birth, as far as such births go. It wasn't a difficult or exceptional birth, and I feel lucky that it wasn't more violent than it was. Many women cannot say the same thing about their medicalized births. What do you call it when strange people harass and touch you against your wishes because they believe they have that right? In most settings, it's a violation. In the hospital, it's called "Standard Care." (No one has the RIGHT to touch you against your wishes. Unfortunately, women in America today often wont say NO because they feel they don't have the right, or because they want to be a "good" girl/patient.)
My second and third children were freeborn. Family home births, medically unassisted, also known as unabirths or UC.
We transported to the hospital after Nova was born. Her birth was a very intense experience for me, but one that help develop and strengthen me. I believe with all my heart that it was meant to be, and I made the right decision for both of us.
Elliott's birth was a waterbirth, and after the placenta was delivered, we went off to bed. It was intimate, magical, and perfect. We had a rocky postpartum period, but I feel blessed to have birthed my big boy at home, into my husband's hands.